Remember

“I’m fifty-five. I don’t feel like starting over,” I bemoaned to a friend. He nodded.

I paced. “This should be my homestretch for retirement.”  

Feeling defeated, I sauntered to my chair and slumped down. “Honestly, I do not know if I have another job interview in me.”

I continued my pity party, knowing I am one of tens of millions of Americans who will experience job loss or be laid off this year alone. It is not fair, but it is nothing new.

The 1980s ushered in the era of downsizing, and, sadly, it has become a business tactic to reduce expenses. Now, some four decades later, that trend has come knocking on my door, and, for the second time in less than ten months, my livelihood is at risk.

I lamented, “Why is this happening to me again?” I permitted myself a few days to grieve my circumstances. Then I thanked God for never leaving nor forsaking me. Like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego walking in the midst of the fire with a fourth man (Daniel 3:24-25), the Lord walked beside me during every job layoff and salary fluctuation I encountered over my thirty-plus-year work life.

I have complete trust in the Lord, yet my knees buckled at the announcement of the possibility of losing my job, yet again. How can I say I trust God and at the same time nearly collapse at bad news?

My age.

In a moment of despair, I complained about starting over at fifty-five. The enemy took advantage of my weak moment and planted negative thoughts. He said I could not compete with the technological acumen of my younger co-workers. My energy level was not what it used to be, and that employers prefer youthful college graduates who are more apt to accept change.

I waged an internal battle of the truths and deceptions about my age. It is true that by the world’s standards I am middle-aged, but it is false to say that I have no value.

The adversary continued to lie, hoping I would not remember the story of Sarah. She smirked at the words of the angel of the Lord, who promised that she would give birth at her advanced age. Isaac was born a year later.

I recalled how God called Moses at eighty years of age to declare to Pharaoh, “Thus says the Lord, let My people go.”  

Noah obeyed God and began constructing the ark somewhere in his five hundredth year of life. The flood started when he was six hundred.

At eighty, Joshua crossed the Jordan and entered the Promised Land with the people he shepherded after Moses died.

For a brief moment, the evil one tried to derail me, but I remembered. I remember how God used the fearful, like Gideon, to defeat a powerful army with only three hundred men, and how David committed the most grievous sins, and God used him to teach us the power of confession and repentance.

Even a bitter, bereaved widow advanced the kingdom of God through mentoring Ruth and counseling Boaz on his role as a kinsman redeemer.

I do not know what the future holds, but I know that God is not done with me. I have faith that the mountains and valleys I’ve traveled over my five decades have positioned me to support children and families whose needs are far greater than mine.

So, I will move forward, update my resume, prepare for potential interviews, and pray for God’s will to be done.

God uses the aged, broken, and sinful for His purposes. The world will attempt to tell you and me that we are not worthy because of our past or current circumstances. I want to encourage you to remember who God says you are: we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works (Ephesians 2:10). Let that truth carry you forward.

If you, too, are in a season of transition, be aware of the enemy’s lies – he will seek to fill you with despair. Cling to God and the truth of His Holy, infallible word, and remember, as written in Psalm 77:11-12, “I shall remember the deeds of the Lord; surely I will remember Your wonders of old.”

May God keep you and bless you,
Tika

What I am Reading: 
The Characters of Creation: The Men, Women, Creatures, and Serpent Present at the Beginning of the World by Daniel Darling. Every Christian who has ever wanted to take an exploratory dive into the creation story must add this book to their Christian studies.

Notable Quote: 

“People’s weariness comes from enduring their own burdens.” Pastor De’Andre Burgs

Just for fun:

I had the pleasure of joining the God Changed My Story Podcast to share my faith journey. Click the link to listen!  
http://https://youtu.be/8jcHbVazOEQ?si=XrD2HmyJtxvUf3n1